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Friday, February 27, 2004
I hadn't thought about the fire in awhile, but for some reason this week it came rushing back. I blamed it on finding the original TV news footage last month while scanning through a bunch of old videotapes. I didn't even know I'd saved it... didn't even remember recording it in the first place... the weeks a.t.f. are fairly fuzzy. Sitting there among the boxes in my livingroom, watching the surreal TV images of my belongings burn, seeing my old roommates interviewed... hit me like a fist to the face.
This week I started dreaming about it again, I'd catch myself thinking about my pre-fire life, how much that night changed me. Little mini-reminders started popping up in converstations. A co-worker asked if I had downhill skis, and I think to myself 'yeah, I used to, before the fire'. My boss asks if I have any Stooges records... same answer.  So this morning I realize there's a reason for all this, and I can't believe it took me so long to figure it out. It's the Burniversary again. Twelve years ago this week. My brain knew it, but I didn't. I don't remember it every year... the reflections get further and further between. Then, out of nowhere, it feels like it just happened. My first and only trip overseas came in the wake of the fire. After the first anniversary, I was able to use some of the insurance cash to fly to London for a 4AD music fest. I needed to get away, and ended up having a couple of the best weeks of my life over there. I've always wanted to go back. A dozen years later, in a post-fire frame of mind, and my job is sending me to London. It's deja vu all over again. Life's weird like that.  |
 neil halstead live in cambridge, ma on november 14th, 2008 previously: joy formidable - boston 2011 recent posts on the 'nac... on the nightstand boston-area music bloggers
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